“…fans can only hope that Mr. Zuckerberg or another tech billionaire will understand this logic and offer to pay off his 53 million dollar debt. Back to you Sanjay.”

“Thank you, Aisha.”

“And finally tonight, we bring you a story from the ‘Where are they now?’ files.”

“Fans and reporters have been abuzz over recent rumours that former Bollywood star Jaiyana Kumar-Singh was spotted on the streets of Cape Town earlier this week. Although the actress has not worked in the industry for several years, many are excited that this appearance may be a sign that she is coming out of hiding and possibly making a sequel to the popular Ek Jeevan Milata Haare.”

“The Indian-born actress grew up in the government districts of Delhi before moving to England to attend Oxford and complete a degree in History. She then interned briefly at The Guardian before her discovery by media mogul Rohan Tata launched a modelling and movie career.”

“Many of you will also recall the controversy surrounding Jaiyana following the mysterious disappearance of her four year old daughter Kiara. Her fantastical claims of “alien abduction” led to rumours of drug use or even criminal activity and triggered involvement by the Central Bureau of Investigation. Although no evidence of wrongdoing was ever uncovered, her persistent claims of extraterrestrial beings led to the breakup of her relationship with Rohan Tata and her blacklisting in the Bollywood community. There were numerous reports of Jaiya’s involvement with several organizations involved in “UFO research” in Southern Africa, and insider sources claim that the actress may have squandered her entire divorce settlement on these fringe groups.”

“So while the most recent sightings may have diehard Jaiyana fans whirling in a frenzy of anticipation, it remains to be seen if the former actress will need a new dress for the runway, or just a new prescription.”